Loading ...Well, I woke up this morning when my ‘cup runneth over’ if you know what I mean. When I speak of ‘cup’, I’m talking about my moon cup. I have a habit of waking up seconds before a real mess is made, which is - for a change - a good habit to have.
I was just going to get up, go to the toilet and go back to bed, but Don was taking his own sweet time in the bathroom, so while bleeding to death waiting for the loo, I also ended up getting too awake to go back to bed. So here I am, fresh moon-cup in my vagina, writing stuff.
When I woke up, it was from a dream about me, R the P, and Mojo. In a mall that was also a school. During an alien invasian. Which is where we were taking a break from stalking celebrities. Brad Pitt to be exact, even though he’s not the first celebrity I’d stalk. But he was the one we saw on the train. What train?
Couldn’t tell ya.
There we were at a table in the food court (upper level) and I looked over the railing to the lower level and said, “Wow, look at those robots.”
R the P said, “Hush, I’m trying to figger out how we’re going to track Brad Pitt.”
Mojo looked over the railing and said, “Yeah… look at those robots. Now, how we gonna find Brad Pitt?”
But but… the robots.
So which celebrities would we stalk? Who would we ignore an impending alien robot invasion to follow through a mall? Who, indeed, would we enter a mall for? (I’d be hard pressed to enter a mall for anyone, truth be told). Well, this is a question I’ll have to ponder as I go back to sleep.
Buy me a beer!
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This entry was posted on Monday, June 18th, 2007 at 6:10 am and is filed under criminal, subliminal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
These days, I’d be much more interested in the robots than in Brad Pitt. Not that if Brad Pitt were here, in front of me, offering to be here in front of me that I’d tell him “You, sir, are no robot!”
Still in the midst of graduating daughters. Soon! Soon!
Ha ha! My Google ads on this page are “Egg Plant Dip” “Egg Plant Recipe” “Banana Recipe” and “Baby Recipe.”
Ha ha! With the three preceding ads, it makes it seem like a recipe made out of babies!
“Jennifer! Look at my baby! I think I was penetrated on holiday by an alien!” (A little French and Saunders humour for those out there thirsty for some F&S!)
But, honestly, why would there be ads for Bananas or Babies on Shattered Prayer? That makes no sense.
Hmm. Thinking about who to stalk. Maybe we could get the robots to help us stalk someone. As long as the stalkee is more interesting in the end than Hux was.
Yeah, I might be bothered to follow a bunch of well-armed robots into a mall, but if I saw Brad Pitt going into a mall, I’d probably shrug and mumble, “Huh… there’s Brad Pitt going into a mall”, then go about my business.
Stalking seems to take an inordinate amount of energy, and what does it accomplish, really?
If you manage, as we did, to avoid arrest, then you just end up meeting the person and they turn out boring. But are there exceptions?
Who is stalkworthy? Or maybe stalking isn’t about the stalkee at all. We’re spiritual people. Maybe its more about the journey, than about the destination.
Well, there you have. Stalking is good for the soul.
Who knew?
I agree. Stalking does take up too much energy, is illegal, and a bit creepy. And the object of “perfection” is just an object for unrealized dreams in a pretty package. They can’t help but be boring once you know them.
I actually don’t know any “celebrities” that I would want to stalk at the moment (and for the FBI reading this, I do not now, nor have I ever, stalked celebrities). I don’t even have many celebrities that I think are drool worthy. The people I tend to want to meet these days are people I can have good conversations with. Writers and the like. Who cares if they’re pretty?
What’s between the ears? That’s what is exciting these days!
Yeah, I agree… when the hell did we get like that?
Robots? I LOVE robots!? Had I been smarter, I would have considered going into robotics. As it stands, I don’t have the match or engineering chops for it, and never will. Alas, I’ll have to wait for the next robot mall takeover to get my jollies.
Stalking… not sure I’d be interested regardless. No one really interests me that much. But I agree that if I were to be interested in meeting someone, it would be someone of substance, not a pretty face. At least not JUST a pretty face.
Girl’s about to graduate in a couple of hours… well, at least the ceremony will begin in a couple of hours. We should finish up around 8-8:30 (ugh… so long!). Amazing that this day has arrived!
Congratulations, A the Girl!
Yes, the one time R the P and I stalked someone, we were actually pretty lazy about it. It was more a matter of, ‘hey, we found something to do this evening’, than it was an urgent obsession. I mean, sure, Hux was awfully nice to look at, but it was the journey that was meaningful. (see… spiritual), not the destination. The destination was downright dull.
You’re right, of course, its just hard to work up enough of an obsession to stalk someone. Especially if you can just sit on your ass, stuffing your face with doughnuts, and watch them on the telly. Its not like we really want to know them.
I’m not even sure I agree with Richard about preferring to meet writers and such. I’d probably rather meet a character in a novel, than the novelist Eself. Sure Clive Barker might be interesting, but I bet an evening with the cenobites would be even more interesting. (maybe a little TOO interesting). Meeting Gabriel Garcia-Marquez would be great, but living in Macondo for a while would be far better (except… maybe not at the end). Would you rather hang out with Lautreamont, or with Maldoror? Mmmm… that might be a bad example. Anyway, you get my drift.
But there are exceptions of course. I’d much rather spend an evening with Lord Byron than with Childe Harold.
Oh and yeh, robots are totally awsome. I was really enjoying that dream before I was so rudely awakened. I’m happy to know that outside my dream, you’d be far more interested in the robots than in Brad Pitt.
Woo hoo!
A the Girl is officially a graduated senior!
Woo hoo!
:woo hoo:
Woohoo!
Congratulations A the Girl!
Paaaaaaaaaarty!
Woohoo!
Our Woohoos travel together! They are in sync. Though not ‘N Sync.
A the Girl has her diploma now. A the Girl is off to college for their orientation! A the Girl is not in our house. She is off doing grown up things! She made it through high school with no more major incidents!
And her crazy bio-mom never even tried to contact her! Not once in over 2 years! That definitely calls for celebration.
And now, Mojo and I just have us and the Puss in house. Hasn’t sunk in yet.
But it’s all good.
It is all slowly getting back to normal. Mojo went to work today. A the Girl is off at her college (and apparently getting her nails did), and I go in tomorrow to sign all the papers at my new (old) job.
Something else happens tomorrow too.
That’s right! Tomorrow is Prince William’s Birthday!
Happy Birthday One Day Heir Apparent! (Although when he was younger, he kinda acted like an Heir Apparent, if you know what I mean) At least he will be Heir Apparent as soon as Queen Granny passes on. Must be quite something to have to wait until your relatives die to get your job.
It’s probably other people’s birthday tomorrow, but really, whose birthday is more important than the future king of England’s? I mean, who is more important than the inbred offspring of some powerless PR position?
Glad to hear things are getting back to normal. Hope you two are enjoying the quietude. The day that all parents wait for - when the kids are off to college and the house is ALL YOURS!
Oh, I hadn’t forgotten about Prince William’s birthday. He and I are so close you know. I met him at that Paris Hilton shindig. I’d send him a birthday card, but I never send anyone a birthday card. So happy birthday, Billy!
Yes! It is all ours! Plans are underfoot for the conversion of her room as we type!
I’m glad you and Billy Boy are so close.
And also, I’m glad tomorrow is the summer solstice as well. I’m tired of having the sun come up at like 4.30. TRYING TO SLEEP, SUN, THANK YOU VERY MUCH! I wish Mojo had gotten to sleep in today instead of immediately having to go back to work, but we’re both off Friday. Yay!
We went to see the Mediocre 4 yesterday after dropping my parents and our daughter off at the airport. The Silver Surfer was kind of neat. Jessica Alba remains completely unable to act and gets yet another nude scene in this film. Apparently that is why Fantastic Four films get made — to see Jessica Alba’s boobs. Of course her boobs were on fire at the time, but, I mean, really. Reeds shirts stretch with him, but her clothes immediately burn off of her.
Of course there was a shirtless scene with Johnny Storm, but his dick wasn’t flailing around on fire like Sue’s boobs.
And there is another string of words I never thought I’d write.
For anyone else — I’d wait for it to be shown on cable. Late at night. For free (minus the cable fee).
There are those who say Stan Lee tapped into the elements when he created the Fantastic Four.
Reed - Stretches and flows like water.
Johnny - Fire. (No brainer on that one)
Ben - Made of stones, so Earth.
Sue - Invisible, like air.
Stan Lee says he doesn’t even remember making them, so don’t ask him.
Thanks for the warning. I really wasn’t planning to go see it anyway. I always thought the concept of a surfing super-hero was a bit silly.
Then again, I get totally enthralled by some of the silliest crap imaginable coming out of Japan.
I’ve got Bacchus on the page right now. Is it just me or is his penis glowing.
Not quite flailing on fire for ya, R the P, but glowing. Maybe its a radioactive penis. Superhero Bacchus. Radioactive Penis Man!
And standing beside him, Pan’s butt seems to be glowing. Bacchus’ sidekick, Radioactive Butt Man!
Obviously one of them caught the radiation from the other one.
When I posted the comment, Radioactive Penis Man disappeared and Ares showed up. Now there’s a superhero you wouldn’t give a silly name to.
Then again, surfing in general is something I find kind of silly, being propelled forward at top speed, by a monstrous wall of water, while balancing on a thin strip of wood. This is not my idea of a fun afternoon. However, sitting on the beach with a margarita, watching people doing it. Thats another story.
I’ve always thought that SOMEONE in the Marvel or DC universe should have a power that comes from their bajayjay or dangle. Especially those mutants in the Marvel Universe. They get their power around puberty after all.
It would make for an odd entry test at Xavier’s Intstitute of Higher Learning at Graymalkin Lane (I threw in the address so Mojo could think to himself, “I married a Geek”
Xavier - “So, applicants, let us see what can you do.”
Applicant 1 - “I can shoot fire from my penis, sir.”
Xavier - “Oh. Well. I can see where that could be handy. We’d have to modify your costume so it wouldn’t actually appear to come from your penis.”
Applicant 1 - “I can only do it when I’m erect, sir.”
Xavier - “Well, we’ll have to work on that. Next?”
Applicant 2 - “I can stretch my penis for three miles, sir.”
Xavier - “Three miles.”
Applicant 2 - “Maybe more. Do you want me to do it now?”
Xavier - “Um. No. Next?”
Applicant 3 - “My vagina expands and forms a pod around evil doers, sir.”
Xavier - “Just evil doers?”
Applicant 3 - “My vagina only likes Evil Doers, sir. It can be a bit embarrassing if I just happen to be in the mall and an Evil Doer walks by.”
Applicant 4 - “Sir, my external labia form wings and allow my to fly! It is the most wonderful feeling!”
Applicant 5 - “My testicles swell up to the size of a wrecking ball, sir. Mind you, they don’t do much once they swell up, but if you suspended me from a rope, you could swing me into something and my balls would knock it down.”
Applicant 2 - “You could suspend him from my penis! We could wreck something from 3 miles away!”
Xavier - “Do any of you have a respectable talent that doesn’t involve labia, testicles, penises, or vaginas?!”
Applicant 6 - “I can play the oboe with my ass, sir.”
And I think Mojo already knows he married a geek.
Actually, when I played WH40K, one of my gangers was a mutant who did shoot fire from his penis.
Its not as handy as one might think.
I imagine it would be a trying power at best.
Hey, do you get to play your games now that you and those who could previously not be named no longer interact? Must be harder to lose that than the interaction.
And I’m all for Margaritas. We are only a few miles from “Down the shore.” We could always stop off there after leaving the pine barrens when you visit. Nothing like Jersey Devil hunting to work up a Margarita thirst.
When my dad was here, I mentioned that most of the Barrens were protected land, so the north of Jersey is far more populated than the south. My dad said, “They’re all protected? What, are they trying to protect the Jersey Devil?”
I thought, “Way to go, Dad! Up on your exo-biology!”
Actually no, I don’t get to play WH anymore. Its a painful loss, I can tell ya. Much more painful than losing an ex-husband, who is a spineless coward with little more to offer my life than a good game of WH.
One day I’ll get the video game. That won’t completely fill the void but its something. And maybe one day I’ll find someone else to play with. Until then, I’ll fondle my favorite models.
Just yesterday, changed the wallpaper on my computer to a WP of Tzeentch. (Chaos god of change). I’ve had a pic of Vincent (of FF: Advent Children) as my wallpaper forever. But his face started to annoy me, and tzeentch brings back such fond memories. Go Tzeentch.
I’m glad the Jersey Devil is a protected species!
I thought that would be a more painful loss than your ex-husband. I know nothing of this Warhammer world. Just looked up Tzeentch on Wikipedia, in fact when you mentioned him. Wikipedia is great. Every now and then you discover that the president of Poland has homosexual relationships with his twin brother due to a cancerous wart on his left testicle (I actually did read that one day when looking up the history of the name “Poland” — it did not stay up long, however), but mostly you just find lots of stuff.
And surely there is someone else who knows about this stuff. It seems to be very popular, from my 2 second research on Wikipedia.
Yep, you can find out all sorts of interesting things from Wikipedia. Some of them nowhere near factual, but interesting nonetheless.
Nice to see the WH afficianados have been carving out a space on the great Wiki.
True! True!
Well, I have to go and run some errands.
And let me just say, Love the Shattered Prayer. I check it every single day. As soon as I get back from my errands, I’ll be checking it again!
I want my models back.
Have fun with the errands!
Yay for SP - we both love it!