Loading ...I’m going to lie around in my underwear and eat pound-cake. I’m going to read. Might watch a bad movie on the sci-fi channel. I’m going to drink too much coffee. I’m gonna smell like dirt (and wine). And nobody better ask me to do a goddam thing.
I thought I’d post this for general interest, but I’m not sure anyone would understand it but Richard. It’s possibly the best campaign item I’ve seen since Hillary’s really scary “Its 3am. Who do you want answering the phone?” ad. At 3am? Anyone but me.
You can see what Neil Gaiman has to say about it on his blog.
You may have noticed I’ve QUIT!
Doing online Tarot readings, that is. Its isn’t so much my lack of time these days, though thats a contributing factor. Its more that the lowest common denominator is sucking the joy out of the act of reading Tarot.
I got fed up with women wanting to know about their love lives. Thats all I ever get, and its the LEAST interesting thing on earth. I’d rather do a reading for an amoeba who wants to know when it will divide.
And its frustrating to draw astrology charts for these creative, vibrant, intelligent women - and all they want to know about is some goddam man.
“Does he still love me?”
Ah’dunno… he’s been gone how many years?
If it were a case of women asking how they can get over it, move on with their lives, build something new, develop themselves. That’d be fine. But no, they always want to know if the creep still loves’em.
NO! okay? NO! Get over it!
They don’t want a Tarot reading, they want me to hold their hand and tell them he’ll be back. And I never do. I tell the truth, then they just get pissed off. So fuck it. I’m cuttin’ the bitches loose. I didn’t sign up to play nursemaid to a bunch of emotional retards.
I’ll still do the occasional local reading. The people around here know me, like me, they know I’m good at what I do. And they know I’ll hand’em their money back if they start whining about their sorry-ass love-lives.
I’ve always hated doing romance readings. Its my least favorite kind of reading to do, but I included it my repertoire. I wanted to be well-rounded. But lately, its just been all I get. Its the only thing anyone ever asks for. I’m beginning to think my name is being passed around some forum for forlorn women.
So its time to just call it quits and rethink what I’m doing. I’d very much like to develop a clientele more concerned with spirituality, development, creativity, etc. But people who are interested in those things aren’t trolling the web for free readings. Until I find a way to attract the kind of clients I want to work with, readings are off.
Of course, I’m still doing readings for my friends, so don’t be afraid to ask. Just… not today. Its my day off.
Buy me a beer!
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I laughed my ass off at the Sandman-Lucifer battle recast as Hilary-Obama battle. And I knew from the first quote who what Obama’s last sentence would be.
Brilliant!
By the way, people say that Hilary brands her first name because it is unusual, and Obama brands his last name for the same reason — but really, people just call ladies by their first name and gents by their last.
Good for your for cutting all these lovelorn people loose! He’ll never come back to you! You’re too whiny about his coming back!
I liked the idea of a lovelorn person asking for that reading and your seeing that they had the potential for being amazing and responding “Forget that loser, look at your potential. Quit your crying and go live up to it!”
Although, in all fairness, a broken heart does hurt.
I’m taking the day off too. I’ve been doing nothing but work, work, work. Grading papers, doing evaluations, etc. etc. Even when I get home I’m, as Mojo told one of our friends “Working on working.” Enough! Nothing but stupid comics, a rifftrax or two, and no thinking!
I agree, a broken heart hurts. But if it hurts for over a decade, you’re doing something wrong.
i’m not totally heartless. not… totally. This just isn’t what I want to work on, and I feel better for having made that decision.
Lucifer ‘08
No. I completely agree. A broken does hurt, but move on. Especially after a decade.
I applaud your decision!
And according to my relatives down in Georgia, Lucifer ‘08 is who the democrats are trying to run this year — no matter who wins the nomination.
Sigh.
Great post! I was shocked to see that gif of Hillary/Lucifer vs Obama/Sandman! I hadn’t seen that one out there.
Good point about stopping the “Will he ever come back to me?” readings. Sounds like a dead on plan. Enough already. Assume the answer is no and move on. Don’t waste my time!
Agree re my vote: Lucifer for a New and Better America. Vote Morningstar in ‘08!
Enjoy your day off, Che!
Thank you Mojo. I can always count on you to be as entirely lacking in sentimentality as I am. Yay for us.
And if Morningstar wins in 08… wouldn’t that make us the first ladies? After all, we’re wed to Satan.
I can see us now, dressed in our Superverse Hell-gear, standing by our man as he spreads chaos and destruction over the face of the earth.
Will you be bringing Richard to the White House? Will our furniture be made of comic books?
Yay! I will take over the East Wing of the White House and fill it with nothing but comics! Then the West Wing. When the president gives a speech from the press room, he’ll have to stand behind a stack of comic book boxes! Special Oval Comic book boxes will be made for the oval office.
And I won’t stop there! The reflecting pool will be drained and filled with Golden Age Comic books!
Lincoln will be torn down from the Lincoln memorial and replaced with Lois Lane!
That statue of Jefferson at the Jefferson memorial will be replaced with a statue of Captain Marvel Jr!
And it will spread out over the entire nation!
Mount Rushmore will now feature Jimmy Olsen, Wonder Woman, the Sandman, and Bat-mite!
This is the ticket that MUST WIN!!!
I do what I can for the sensible voter. Sentimentality won’t help anyone. Lucifer is our only hope. We tried the ‘other’ party and they didn’t do any good.
Oh, yes! I can’t wait to be Superverse Hell Gear wearin’ First Lady! Sweet. We will be angels of death in Prada horseshoes (but we’ll call them something else… I don’t like the horse affiliation. I mean, honestly - can’t a First Lady have hooves without having to buy shoes in a feed store?!).
Of course I’ll bring Richard but his plans seem a bit… far afield. Still, the chaos caused by the Lois Lane Monument in central DC fits in with Lucifer’s general plan, so I guess it will be OK. Surely he won’t mind the redecoration. According to my parents, comics are a tool of Satan, anyway, so Richard’s plan could actually work to our benefit!
I want bumper stickers.