The Shattered Prayer

“Don’tcha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?”
What? No eight year old should go around singing that, and yet she does. So I taught KK the ‘real’ lyrics to the song. “Don’t you wish your kittie was cute like Bea.” Hell I like those lyrics better anyway. What a stupid song. Is this the […]

Of course not.
The pork roast was magnificent. Best one ever cooked in this house. I carefully balanced aromatic herbs and spices to delicately enhance the mild flavour of the roast. And of course I added beer in the hopes of tricking the rednecks into accepting it as ‘their kind of food’.
Didn’t work. Bay […]

12 people subscribe to the Shattered Prayer news feed. Twelve people we never hear a peep out of. 12 lurkers. Eek, creepy.
Twelve.
Maybe they’re disciples. Maybe they’re the rest of my coven. Who knows?
Well, I want to know. This is an audience participation blog, so don’t just lurk - participate. Even if its […]

Grubs taste like pork, reputedly. So does human meat. I’d be hard pressed to eat a grub, however, I’ll do it for money. Seriously. Name your price, and if it suits me, I’ll eat a grub. Maybe two. I’ll eat a human too, but only if my plane crashes into the side of a snow-cloaked […]

Pork roast for dinner tomorrow, and I have decided to lock Don in the closet so that not a drop of Worcestershire sauce touches that succulent fire-pig. I’ve commandeered the pork, I’m taking over. But I’ve found a recipe that I’m sure will appeal to everyone, even the rednecks. Maybe especially the rednecks. Beer-braised pork […]

Meh, here it is 4:30 in the morning. I just woke up from some weird dream and had to pee, now I can’t go back to sleep. Yesterday was spent jawing to the bank and trying to track down this guy’s transactions with my card. Today I reckon I’ll be devising emergency plans to cover […]

Its one of those moments that makes me want to scream, Why me? I mean… why me? I’m sitting here eating undercooked ground beef. Hemolytic anemia is actually looking pretty good right now.
Oh wait, but I’m the Shattered Prayer gal. I can laugh it off, pretend like everything’s okay. Ain’t nuthin’ but a thing. […]

I’m still doing the cooking around here. My mother isn’t supposed to cook while she’s still on any medication that makes her dizzy. I made a casserole tonight. Everyone loved it. Except Don. His words, “You know how I feel about rice! I saw too much of it in Vietnam!”. Sigh.  So it wasn’t just […]

Everyone wants something different. Don likes his pork-chops fried. My mother wants hers broiled with lemon and pepper. K.K. likes hers barbequed. And who’s the cook? Me.
Mom was released from the hospital this morning - she’s doing much better. I’m feeling a little frayed around the edges though. I need some breathing space; I’m […]

I just wanted to say Happy New Year to all the Chinese people and wish everyone a joyful and prosperous fire-pig year.
My mother began the year of the fire-pig with a fever. The pig set her on fire. She went to the hospital last night, leaving me to look after KK. I miss my […]

KK: What’re you doing?
Me: Reading.
KK: Why is it so quiet in here?
Me: Because I’m reading.
KK: Why does it need to be quiet for you to read?
Me: So I can concentrate.
KK: I don’t like the quiet. I can’t do anything if its quiet.
Me: You should try it sometimes. Just a couple of minutes a […]

I know I haven’t posted in a while, but the whole family has been sick - everyone but me. There’s only one thing worse than being sick, and thats when everyone else but you is sick. And in this particular case, everyone had something different. But everyone seems on the mend, just in time for […]

I found out today it would take near-bouts 3000 Reese’s Cups to kill me. This is a theory I would like to test one day.
I am supposed to die in a horrible ceiling-fan accident, but since the Nightstalker decided to steal my modus mortui, I might opt for something more original. Death by Reese’s […]

Thats right, Cleto is one year old on February 11. He’s gone from looking like a weird, skinny, chupacabra to being a sleek, beautiful chupacabra. At one year old, he’s no less goofy, moody or mischievous. And he still has enormous feet.
He shares a birthday with Sheryl Crow, Jennifer Anniston, and Pope Gregory XIV. […]

Little ole me with my four readers was hacked. I think I’ve gotten rid of the malicious code, now I have to tweak things back the way they were, but for those of you who were wondering why  SP was all scrunched up on one side of the page with all the white space (R […]