The Shattered Prayer

I’m sure no one gives a crap how my polyphasics are going, but I’ll tell’ya anyway. I had to ditch the schedule for a while because while mom was in the hospital I was looking after KK, and KK can’t sleep alone. Which meant I had to sleep with her. You’d never think a 9 year old would be capable of stealing all the covers and pushing you off the bed, but you’d be wrong.

Certain strains of Christian fundamentalism would have us believe that it’s awfully easy to get possessed. All it takes is a sip of liquor, an afternoon of jazzercise, a ninja movie or a night of trick-or-treating and whammo, you got the demon in ya. Well lemme tell’ya…

I looked into this ancestry thing as a gift to my father.  Who knew that it would be such a gift to me as well?  I am royalty, people!  That’s right, Queen Elizabeth II and I are cousins!  It really doesn’t matter that we are 9th Cousins, 3 times removed.  I could still be king — if most of England and a lot of the U.S. dies.  But if they do, I could reign as King Richard IV!  (Kings named Richard are usually good for England aren’t they?  Winter of discontent and all that?  Anyone?)  And my exciting connections don’t stop at Liz.  I’m related to all sorts of interesting people! 

Our daughter has gone off to college, and that has brought mixed joy and sadness, but one unexpected recipient of sadness is my father.  Mojo and I had long planned to have another child, this time by surrogacy.  My father has been more excited about this than either of us.  I’m his only male child and he desperately wants to pass along that Y chromosome.  But now that we have a child-free existence, we’ve put those plans on hold.  My father is crushed.  So for his birthday I decided if I couldn’t give him his genetic future, I’d give him his genetic past. 

So whaddya do with all that extra time?

Play video games.

Just kidding. Its not that bad.

I’m quite looking forward to my first nap of the day.

Brittany Spears on my back porch, and I’m giving her relationship advice. Now see… this is the stuff that I do not want to remember.